005 - Protectors - Late Night Studies

005 - Protectors - Late Night Studies

Content Warnings
- Mention of spiders
- Mention of alcohol
- Bone cracking

[Show intro plays]

ROVER

Hello everyone and welcome back to Remains To Be Seen, the DnD show where one group's past can determine the other group's future. I am your host and DM Rover Elliott, pronouns he/they, and today I am here with...

ALYSSA

Alyssa, she/her, and happy that we have our whole party now! (Cheers)

RIK

Rik, he/him, and I am very excited to see where this whole encounter goes.

ALYSSA

(Quietly) Oh my god.

ZOE

Zoe, she/they, and I am scared for this next encounter, but it's fine.

MIKE

Mike, he/him, and I'm just happy to be here.

ROVER

Mike's here!

(Everyone cheers)

ALYSSA

We got Mike now!

MIKE

Let's go!! Let's play some DnD, baby! Whoo!

ROVER

All our mics probably peaked, I am so sorry.

[Laughter]

However, who are you guys playing?

ALYSSA [as YITRI]

Yitri, she/her, and I am double caffeinated right now, and ready to either be professional or fight someone. I don't really know what's going on right now. (Laughs)

RIK [as PIERRE]

Pierre Ardoise, he/him, and I am feeling incredibly protective right now.

ZOE [as ALEKS]

Aleks, he/him, and I just don't want to be here right now. I want to leave.

MIKE [as KOL]

Koltrast, he/him. My god, I've got to get these people out of this situation.

ROVER

So, our new player. Can you please explain what happened in the previous episodes or episode?

MIKE

In the previous episode, the gang met up with my character at Manchester Station and were whisked off to a coffeeshop just around the corner to find the contact that my character had been informed of prior to. And we've ended up in a bit of a sticky situation. After a small exchange over a coffeeshop table, which ended up at gunpoint, we ordered four coffees and had a lovely chat about who we were and who we weren't. And then, we found ourselves locked in with two people we've never met before. And we don't know if we're gonna leave.

ROVER

Alright. So, we have currently at the counter, we have Aleks and Pierre. And we have Carl the barista or bartender, whatever you wanna call it.

MIKE

Bartender!

ZOE

It’s coffee with alcohol.

ROVER

Bartender. We're gonna keep calling it bartender.

MIKE

Carl the bartender.

ROVER

Carl the bartender locked the door on them and we have Kol and Yitri together with this, probably contact, Elowin next to them. And they just pushed Yitri down, back on the chairs and slid a missing person's poster towards her with Aleks' face on it. So we’ll pick up from there. This has just happened, Yitri.'

ALYSSA

She's looking at the paper, and it's very clearly Aleks. And Aleks is also standing right there. It's the thing.

ROVER

They have not noticed.

ALYSSA

So she's gonna, kind of, look up at Aleks, and look back down at the paper. Look up at Aleks again, (chuckles) and back down at the paper. And kind of look at Elowin, kind of like, "Shouldn't... he's literally right there. Why are you asking me?" kind of thing. But (laughing) because she's like... And she's like,

ALYSSA [as YITRI]

So, you're asking if this person is...

ALYSSA

No... Ok. Hmm, I don't know how I wanna go about doing this. Uuh. She's gonna, kind of, be like,

ALYSSA [as YITRI]

If you're our contact, shouldn't you know everyone who's in our group?

ROVER [as ELOWIN]

If you think I've been informed well, then you are clearly mistaken.

ALYSSA [as YITRI]

Look, same boat, we’re… I'm in the same exact boat as you, cause I... we don't know anything. We weren't told anything. So, you know, I get you. I get you.

ALYSSA

Also did she notice that the door is locked?

ROVER

Give me a Perception check.

ALYSSA

Aargh, where did my dice go?

ZOE

You got this, Yitri!

ALYSSA

Aaargh!

MIKE

(Chuckles) Come on, man.

ALYSSA

I don't know where my good dice went that I was rolling with.

ROVER

Aleks and Pierre, –

[Agonised laughs from Alyssa in the background]

– also give me a Perception check to see if you guys can overhear the conversation there.

ALYSSA

I got a 5. (Cries)

MIKE

Oh, no.

ROVER

Nah!

ALYSSA

I can't do my cool thing

ZOE

Yitri!

ROVER

You have not even noticed that Carl has moved.

ALYSSA

Ok.

ZOE

Uh, 21.

RIK

Jesus.

ROVER

Aleks is overhearing this. Pierre?

RIK

5. Oh, sorry, 6.

[Laughter]

ROVER

Pierre, you are focused on Aleks, who is clearly panicking, and Aleks can hear... like, notices everything that's happening at that table. Yitri. The door is fine. The door is not unlocked. What do you mean? "Not unlocked"? Not locked.

MIKE

Meanwhile Kol is looking over at both of them, simultaneously, trying to weigh up the situation with one person claiming that they weren't... they also weren't informed. And another person claiming that they don't know anything about the wanted poster. And he looks over... he looks over at Aleks and ìs like... He just... he just points and then gestures for Aleks to join the table.

ALYSSA [as YITRI]

Look, I was getting there, I just knew... to suss out the situation. I was gonna get there.

ROVER

Elowin turns their head to Aleks. Now, I need to know; Aleks, are you looking at the group or are you turning away?

ZOE

I am currently looking at the locked door.

ROVER

At the locked door. I'm gonna see if they now do recognize you –

[Dice thumps]

– or are they still... (High pitched) Uuuhh.

[Quiet laughter]

ALYSSA

Put on a mustache! Put on a mustache!

ROVER

(Normal) That means they are...

[Laughter]

ZOE

Aleks is standing there just like, hand on... finger on his lips, like, "That's not me".

[More laughter]

MIKE

(Laughs) They can't see me.

ROVER

Uhm, and they are... They frown for a moment and they clearly seem to be thinking. And then they look down at the wanted poster and look back up. They fold the paper back in and puts it in his pocket. And goes,

ROVER [as ELOWiN]

Oh, you do... you guys are professionals. Good to know.

ROVER

Stands up, walks to Aleks, puts a hand on his shoulder and is like,

ROVER [as ELOWIN]

I think you need to come with me.

ZOE

Aleks kinda tenses under the touch and he basically looks anywhere but Elowin's face, and he's like... very clearly scared.

ZOE [as ALEKS]

I don't think I will. I have no business with you.

ROVER [as ELOWIN]

I think I have to.

ROVER

And then they, from the hand that is not on your shoulder, seems to grab something below their coat.

MIKE

Oh, Kol sees that, right? Kol's gotta clock... Do you want me to roll for it?

ROVER

Go for it.

MIKE

Ok, Perception, right?

ALYSSA

(Quietly) He’s got a gun!

ROVER

Yeah, go for a Perception check.

MIKE

Oh, ok. So it's… 19.

ROVER

Oh, you definitely... yeah, you definitely see that.

MIKE

Ok. Kol sees Elowin reaching for something and stands up from the table and walks over. Puts his hand firmly on Elowin's shoulder, and is like,

MIKE [as KOL]

Don't do anything stupid. You can still walk away from this.

ROVER

Roll me Initiative, everyone.

ALYSSA

What the – Aargh, I was trying to avoid that!

RIK

Question.

ROVER

Yes.

RIK

There is Pierre in all this?

ROVER

Pierre is there! (Laughs)

[Crosstalk]

MIKE

You're right there, man.

ALYSSA

He's there, buddy. Are you fucking kidding?!

RIK

Oh. I am right there?

MIKE

You are right there in the middle of all this.

ROVER

You're right there!

RIK

I thought I didn't notice any of this!

[Crosstalk ends]

ZOE

(Laughs) You are next to me!

ROVER

You have no... At the moment that people – that Elowin went to Aleks –

RIK

Oh.

ROVER

– you can see this.

RIK

Oh.

ROVER

The only thing you didn't notice was what they were talking about at the table.

RIK

Oh, oh, I see. (Snickers)

ROVER

I would like Initiative.

ALYSSA

I got a 5.

MIKE

I got a 7.

ROVER

Ok, hold up.

[Dice clacks]

So, Initiative basically... when things are going into either combat or you need to kind of understand how things are going in time-wise, we roll Initiative. Which is basically, you roll your D20, you add your Dexterity modifier or any other bonuses if that's told in either feats or other types of stuff.

[Dice ASMR in the background]

And, yeah, I'm gonna have to write this down. Oh god, this is gonna be crazy. Alright. So we have a... do we have anyone above 20?

ALYSSA

No, we do not.

MIKE

No.

ROVER

Between 19 and 15?

RIK

Uh...

ROVER

Yeah, what do you have, Pierre?

RIK

16.

MIKE

Aaahh!

ALYSSA

Everyone else is a single digit.

MIKE

Pierre, the unobservant.

[Laughter]

ALYSSA

He just saw that someone started pulling out a gun, he was like, "Oh shit, they got a gun!"

RIK

Oh, fuck!

[Laughter]

ALYSSA

You said you were ready to protect, so...

RIK

Yeah! Yeah, I was gonna protect Aleks, (Stammers) but I guess I-I was stupid enough to not notice.

ROVER

Guys!

RIK

Yeah.

ROVER

Between 5 and 10?

ALYSSA

I got 5.

MIKE

Yeah, 7.

ZOE

Everyone else, basically.

ROVER

Alright, Aleks. And then 7 was Kol, right?

MIKE

Yep.

ZOE

Yeah.

ROVER

And then Yitri with...

ALYSSA

5.

ROVER

Got it. So. Between that, we also still have a... a Carl who is also there, I guess.

RIK

(Whispering) Carl.

MIKE

(High pitched) Carl!

[Rik giggles]

ZOE

Yeah. He's still standing at the door that he locked.

ROVER

Alright. So, Pierre, you see all of this go down. You have seen... Elowin reach into the inside of their jacket and Kol putting a firm hand on their shoulder and basically warning them. It's your turn.

RIK

(Sighs) How far away am I from Elowin?

ROVER

I will say not that far, I would say about 5 feet.

RIK

Ok. Pierre will walk up to them and be like,

RIK [as PIERRE]

Hold the phone there, mate. Hold the phone, There's no need to do anything here. We're just gonna get out, and that's that.

MIKE

Pierre, the Peacekeeper.

ROVER

Roll me a Persuasion check.

RIK

They told us... they told us only to hurt people if it was needed, so, Pierre's gonna live with that. Ok. Persuasion.

[Good dice thumps]

Persuasion. 15.

ROVER

15.

MIKE

(Wheezes) For the record

ROVER

I hate this goddamn game. I hate this goddamn game.

MIKE

Rover just put his head in his hands. (Laughs)

ZOE

He seems devastated.

[Laughter]

ROVER

So, we're out of Initiative.

[Laughter]

ALYSSA

Oh shit! Oh shit! Oh my god! Nat 1! Nat 1! Oh...

RIK

Let's go! Uh, let's go!

ALYSSA

Pierre the GOAT, oh my god. I was not expect–

MIKE

Pierre the Unobservant Peacekeeper.

ALYSSA

I was fully ready to fight.

RIK

Yeah.

ROVER

I need this on the record: I am, and have always been, this has been a curse; any other dice than a specific D20 in the bag that I have, I never roll well. Except for that dice.

[Alyssa laughs]

And that dice has been gone for about 4 weeks. Four weeks? Four months, hold up.

RIK

It’s been on holiday.

ROVER

And I rolled it last time and it was a 1 again. So now all of my dice are fucking cursed, or I am.

ALYSSA

Oh god.

Anyway, you guys are out of Initiative.

RIK

Good for us!

(Chuckles) Elowin puts whatever they had back in and holds up their hands, is like,

ROVER [as ELOWIN]

Fine. What do you want? Let me go, I just need to take him with me.

ROVER

I am noticing, by the way, that Elowin's accent is changing. Sorry.

RIK

Who are they pointing to?

MIKE

Aleks.

ROVER

Aleks. Aleks.

RIK

Aleks.

RIK [as PIERRE]

No, you don't. Talk to me first. What's going on? Talk me through it.

ROVER

Give me another Persuasion check. Actually –

MIKE

Kol is, like, flabbergasted that this is the approach that you've taken.

[Laughter]

He's trying to play it cool, but you can see that, if you're really good at Perception, you can see that there's just this look of "what the fuck did you just say?" that comes across his face.

[Laughter]

ALYSSA

Yitri is like white-knuckling her axe and looking at everyone around, like fully... she was ready, and she's like,

ALYSSA [as YITRI]

(Whispering) What the fuck?

ALYSSA

Like, she's actually mouthing "what the fuck?".

[Laughter]

ROVER

With a nat 1, I'm gonna say you don't even have to roll another Persuasion check. They stand there with their hands up in the air and is like,

ROVER [as ELOWIN]

I need them for my boss.

RIK [as PIERRE]

Your boss being?

ROVER [as ELOWIN]

If I don’t bring this person to him, I am fucked.

MIKE [as KOL]

Well, you take them, you're also fucked. So choose.

ROVER

Yitri, how is going over there at the table?

[Laughter]

ALYSSA

Yitri's just looking around, like, "what is happening?" She's just frantically... like, her head is whipping between everyone in the room and she's still holding her axe. She's just so confused how this is happening? Pierre just said, "Ha, don't", and now everyone's like, "Yeah, we're just not gonna do it". One; that's not how things work.

MIKE [as KOL]

So here's how this is gonna go down. You're gonna sit down at that table and my colleague here is going to ask you some questions. Understand?

ROVER [as ELOWIN]

Fine.

ROVER

And they kinda try to slowly back away to the table that you guys were sat at.

ZOE

What is Carl doing?

RIK

Yeah, what is Carl doing?

ALYSSA

(Lauhging) He left.

ZOE

Is he still at the door?

ROVER

Carl is looking at this, still at the door, and... Actually, Aleks, give me a Perception check. With advantage cause I want you to.

ALYSSA

Because I want you to know this.

[Dice clacks]

MIKE

I want you to look. I want you to see.

ROVER

Yeah, I want you to see this.

ZOE

The advantage didn't really help.

ROVER

But if it's shit, then it's still shit.

ZOE

Yeah. Uh, 12.

ROVER

Oh, no, that's all good. You can see that his hand goes behind his back and you hear a *click* of the door unlocking.

[Chuckles]

So, they go to sit at the table, place their hand very carefully onto the table, like,

ROVER [as ELOWIN]

So. What do you want to know?

MIKE

Kol looks at Pierre.

RIK [as PIERRE]

Who sent you here? Why are you after Aleks?

ROVER [as ELOWIN]

Well, I'm pretty sure you will also have noticed that he is missing. I'm just trying to, you know… bring him back for his family.

ROVER

Give me an Insight check. Everyone give me an Insight check.

MIKE

Both of us?

ALYSSA

I was gonna say, I am Insighting that shit.

MIKE

All of us, ok. Alright.

ROVER

I need to know, by the way, is Aleks also now sitting at the table?

ZOE

No, he's kinda standing off to the side. Cause he’s not at the table, but he's closer to the table than he was before, but he is keeping his distance to Elowin. He's kinda, like, rooted to the spot.

ROVER

Yeah. Carl is definitely keeping an eye on you.

ALYSSA

Nat 20!

MIKE

Oh, I got a dirty 20.

RIK

Which check again?

ALYSSA

Insight,

ROVER

Insight, yes.

ALYSSA

Also, Ro, question. If someone crits, but they have a negative, does it still count as a crit? Cause my Insight is negative 1.

ROVER

It still counts as a crit, yeah, absolutely. Absolutely. If it's... A natural 20, is a natural 20.

ALYSSA

Yaay!

ROVER

I don't give a shit about your modifiers. Uhm, except for if it's, like, a plus 12, then having a 32 is kinda cool.

ALYSSA

Ooohh!

[Mike chuckles]

ROVER

However, yeah, so you rolled a nat 20. Then I want... Yeah, Insight check from Kol and Pierre.

MIKE

Mine was a dirty 20.

ROVER

Dirty 20.

RIK

14.

ROVER

Ok. Pierre, you aren't necessarily sure if he's telling the truth or not. And Kol and Yitri can immediately tell, like –

ALYSSA

Bullshit.

ROVER

– he's talking garbage. This is not what he's looking for. There's other stuff going on. You can see that he is, kinda of, shifting their gaze between you guys and Aleks as well. In a sort of panicky way.

MIKE

Kol's gonna walk up to the table from where he was stood around Pierre to, sort of, give Pierre a sightline. And slams his hand down on the desk and go,

MIKE [as KOL]

(Angrily) Tell him the truth!

ALYSSA

Damn, I was gonna do that, but you did it a lot better than I was gonna do, but…

[Laughter]

ROVER

Hey, can you gi- You know what? Give me an Intimidation check with advantage.

MIKE

Alright. Ok.

ROVER

Because that was cool.

ALYSSA

I was about to do the exact same thing. I hope you know, I literally was about be, like, "she's gonna slam her and say, like, "Bullshit!"" But, you did it cooler. (Laughs)

ROVER

I think it’s even more fun if you both do this at the same time.

MIKE

Oh my god.

ROVER

That's why you have advantage, because you're helping.

MIKE

So, the first one that I rolled was a 16. The second one that I rolled was a dirty 20. (Laughs)

ROVER

Makes sense, the dice know. So, hands on the table and you can see that they... Hmm?

ALYSSA

Actually, Yitri's gonna put her axe on the table and kind of lay it there and do nothing with it, and just kinda holds... put it there, and then have... it's also a giant battle axe, so she's gonna lay it down on the table and then let Kol talk.

RIK

God.

ROVER

Uh, so, they flinch for a moment and it's a thing, like,

ROVER [as ELOWIN]

Fine! Fine! I'm working for Chester King. I'm not sure if that name is, uhm... of any importance to anyone except for, uh, this guy over there.

ROVER

And they hint towards Aleks.

ROVER [as ELOWIN]

And listen, if I wasn't terrified of the man before, I am now. I don't... (Sighs)I don't know where he is. However he's told me to bring him somewhere and that's all I know.

ALYSSA [as YITRI]

Where did he tell you to bring him?

ALYSSA

She kinda starts inching the axe a little closer on the table towards…

ROVER [as ELOWIN]

Chesterfield.

ALYSSA [as YITRI]

(Laughing) Sorry, wait, Chester King told you to send him to Chesterfield? (Laughs)

ROVER [as ELOWIN]

I know it's –

ALYSSA [as YITRI]

(Continues to laugh at Elowin) I'm sorry, that's really... Oh... I know this is serious.

ROVER

They get so red in the face.

ALYSSA [as YITRI]

(Laughing) I know this is really serious, but... Oh my god, wait, that's, sorry... He had to have done that on purpose. I'm sorry, he had to have. Like, was that planned?

RIK [as PIERRE]

Yitri, to business please.

MIKE

Kol puts a very gentle hand on Yitri's shoulder.

ALYSSA [as YITRI]

Oh, ok.

MIKE

Not in a threatening way, but just in a very gentle...

ALYSSA

She takes a deep breath and is like,

ALYSSA [as YITRI]

(Takes a deep breath) Ok, continue, sorry.

MIKE

Kol looks back at Pierre.

RIK

Pierre just nods at Kol as to what he just said.

MIKE

He nods back.

ROVER [as ELOWIN]

I – Listen man, I don’t… (sighs) I don't know what to do either. I-I just need... I just need him there. And this is a... this is a problem for everyone, ok? I don't want to... I don't even know dying is the right word for it, but I do not want to become death itself.

ALYSSA [as YITRI]

Well, that's kind of a leap from dying to death itself. I feel like that's, kind of, a dramatic leap.

ROVER [as ELOWIN]

If I was being dramatic, you guys would've known this is –

ALYSSA [as YITRI]

I'm not saying you're being dramatic, I'm just saying that's a –

ROVER [as ELOWIN]

(Firm) Fine!

RIK

What's Aleks looking like right now?

ZOE

Shaken.

RIK

Shaken.

MIKE

Kol takes a half step back and looks at the scene in front of him, and says,

MIKE [as KOL]

Listen. From one person to another, I can see you're in trouble. But threatening these people is not the right way to go about it. Now you know something about why we're here. And we know very little about you. So if you come with us, you'll at least be okay for the time being, or we can figure this mess out. But if you pull anything or put a single hand on them, this changes. Understood?

ROVER

Give me either an Intimidation or a Persuasion, whatever you wanna do.

MIKE

(Flirty) Ooh! You're gonna let me choose? You're so kind.

ROVER

(Also flirty) Yeah!

MIKE

(Still flirty) You're so silly.

[Laughter]

ROVER

(Laughing) I love the contrast between Kol and Mike, it's so funny!

[Laughter]

ALYSSA

(Laughing) It's so good. It's so good!

MIKE

What did you say sorry? Intimidation or...

ROVER

Intimidation or Persuasion, depends on what you want to do.

MIKE

Or Persuasion, ok.

MIKE

I'll go with Intimidation.

ROVER

Got it.

MIKE

It's a 13.

ROVER

Ok.

[Dice thumps]

(Sighs) Fuck the dice.

[Laughter]

The dice can go fuck themselves.

ALYSSA

Can that be the name of this episode?

[Laughter]

It's just "Fuck the dice".

ROVER

They say,

ROVER [as ELYWON]

I cannot go with. If I am gone for longer than I am supposed to be, once again, I am fucked.

RIK [as PIERRE]

Fucked in what way?

ROVER [as ELOWIN]

You have no idea what there is in there. I don't know what it is even. I can't go with. I can only give information. I will not set a foot near Manchester University, ok?

RIK [as PIERRE]

Why Manchester University?

ALYSSA [as YITRI]

That's very specific. Did you get, like, kicked out or something?

ROVER

He looks over at Aleks and is like,

ROVER [as ELOWIN]

Huh. Something like that.

ALYSSA [as YITRI]

Ok, so, you can't... we can't exactly leave you here and we can't give you what you want and you can't come with us. So either way, I think your options are just which one are you less fucked-over by?

MIKE [as KOL]

What my colleague says, I think your usefulness to us has ended. Leave.

ALYSSA [as YITRI]

Right, yeah.

ROVER [as ELOWIN]

I would rather die at the hands of you guys or leave than I would to go back to him.

RIK [as PIERRE]

Then I suggest you leave.

ROVER

Give me another Persuasion check. With advantage.

MIKE

While you're rolling the Persuasion check, Kol is going to walk around –

[Good dice clacks]

– Oh my god, what was their name again? Elowin?

ROVER

Elowin, yeah.

ALYSSA

Uh, Elowin?

MIKE

Yeah. So while you're rolling that, Kol is gonna walk around to the other side of Elowin, so he puts himself in a position to put a look towards the door over Elowin.

RIK

I rolled a 16.

ROVER

16. Cursed dice, come back.

ALYSSA

Everyone's really intimidating in this party, that's awesome.

RIK

Oh.

ROVER

I should call them cursed dice more often.

RIK

Oh fuck.

ALYSSA

No!

ROVER

He looks back to Kol before looking back to Aleks and is like,

ROVER [as ELOWIN]

Fine, I'll leave. As long as I can take him with me.

ALYSSA

No, no, no, no, no, no, no.

MIKE

Kol takes a half step backwards and prepares his wings and flaps them towards him and casts Gust of Wind with a view to blowing him through the window.

[Laughter]

RIK

Uh, yes. Uh, yes!

ALYSSA

Oh my god! Holy shit!

ROVER

Explain to me what Gust of Wind is.

MIKE

So Gust of Wind is an ability that Aarakocra have, because they get the Wind Caller feat –

ROVER

Yeah.

MIKE

– which allows them to cast Gust of Wind. So Gust of Wind... Well, it is what it says it is. Gust of Wind is an ability that allows you to cast a channel of wind in whatever direction that you want to. I think it's over 30 feet? Is it 30 feet? Hold on, let me double check. Uh, 60 feet, sorry.

ROVER

Oh!

MIKE

So, you cast a channel of wind over 60 feet long and 10 feet wide in any direction. Which is why I put Kol facing towards the door. So that if this went bad, he has a clear channel past everyone else –

ROVER

Mmhmm.

MIKE

–through that way.

ROVER

Does Elowin need to make any checks or something?

MIKE

Uh, let me check. I would guess that it would be a Strength check., Hold on. (Mumbles to himself*)*** Yes, it's a Strength saving throw.

ROVER

Ok. Uhm, pulling the stat block back. Alright, that was definitely not necessary. I knew it was fucking strength.

[Dice thumps]

[Zoe chuckles]

ROVER

So. Gust of Wind happens. This fellow was not prepared for any of this.

[Alyssa laughs]

And flies –

[The sounds of a glass window breaking]

– through the window onto the ground. And you can see the... as the glass shatters, you can see the cuts happening on their face as the glass slides through the flesh there. And he is like, (grunts in pain), and he's on the ground and you can see Carl in the corner just looking at Elowin, looking at the group and then just says,

ROVER [as CARL]

I saw nothing.

ALYSSA

That's right, you didn't see anything! And she... Yitri grabs her axe off the table and holds it up and is like,

ALYSSA [as YITRI]

That's right, you didn't see anything!

ROVER

So, yeah, this Elowin is now (laughing) out of the coffeeshop.

[Small chuckle]

MIKE

Kol turns immediately to Aleks and is like,

MIKE [as KOL]

We need to leave right now.

MIKE

And grabs you by the arm. Not in a threatening way, but in a "I'm gonna move you" kind of way.

ZOE

Yeah.

MIKE

And starts to persuade you towards the door.

ZOE

There is no persuading, Aleks lets himself be moved, like, he's on board completely.

ROVER

So are you guys going through the door or through the broken window? Cause there's a lot... there's a lot of options, yeah.

MIKE

Kol takes Aleks by the shoulder and just... not... obviously not forcefully, but with a little bit of force, enough to just move them in the direction as they step through the hole that was the front window. Looks over at Elowin and goes,

MIKE [as KOL]

Negotiations are over!

MIKE

And then walks around the corner and off into the night.

RIK

Whoo! Whoo!

ROVER

Pierre and Yitri, do you guys follow?

RIK

I walk through the front door actually.

ALYSSA

Yitri's gonna follow Pierre and be like,

ALYSSA [as YITRI]

I'm so glad this guy is on our side, because holy shit!

RIK [as PIERRE]

I agree with you.

RIK

So, I walk up to the bartender and say,

RIK [as PIERRE]

Listen, sorry for the hand thing. Sorry.

RIK

And he rumbles through his bag, gives him a bunch of coin, uh...

ROVER

How much? I need to know.

RIK

I'd say, uh... 15 gold?

ALYSSA

Dayum!

ROVER

Fifteen gold, alright.

RIK [as PIERRE]

Sorry for the damages.

ROVER

Take that off of your coin chart. And he's like,

ROVER [as CARL]

Uh, thank... thank you. Uhm, I-I promise I-I saw nothing.

RIK [as PIERRE]

Much appreciated, mate.

RIK

And as quickly as he did that, he's just gonna walk through the door and out.

ROVER

Carl yells after Pierre.

ROVER [as CARL]

Also free coffee!

RIK [as PIERRE]

Thanks! (Chuckles)

ROVER

Uhm, so yeah, you guys... This final thing. Elowin stumbles up and then even more, like, kind of, rushes away further into Manchester. Not the way that you guys are going.

RIK

Do we see him scamper off?

ROVER

You can see him scamper off, absolutely.

RIK

Pierre mumbles under his breath.

RIK [as PIERRE]

Punk.

MIKE

(Clapping) Oh, fucking... fucking got 'em, Pierre.

[Laughter]

Fucking got 'em, let's go! Yeah!

ALYSSA

You showed him!

MIKE

(Laughing) Yeah!

[Sound of crickets chirping begin in the background]

ROVER

Pierre's like, "Ok, we can talk this through, you know? Walk me through it, you know? We can have this conversation. Oh, you are blown through the window? Oh, we're running away? Huh, punk."

MIKE

Yeah!

[Laughter]

RIK

Yeah.

MIKE

(Laughing) Yeah, fuck that guy! Fuck that guy!

ZOE

Pierre's had enough!

MIKE

Oh, man.

ROVER

Oh god. Ok, you guys are headed back off into the night. It's about... we're getting towards 11:30 right now, in the evening.

MIKE

So, at this point I think, after we can see that the coast is clearer, Kol still, obviously, like, not holding Aleks anymore, but gently has an arm sort of shadowing behind to usher you forwards, is like,

MIKE [as KOL]

That Pierre is one hell of a negotiator. Where did you guys train?

ZOE [as ALEKS]

I met Pierre today. I don't know.

MIKE [as KOL]

What?

[Laughter]

[Unintelligible noises from Rik]

MIKE [as KOL]

You don't know each other?

ZOE [as ALEKS]

No.

MIKE [as KOL]

My god.

[Alyssa laughs]

MIKE

As he silently continues ushering you down the street looking for signs to Manchester University.

RIK

Can Pierre try to catch up with Aleks and Koltrast?

ALYSSA

Yeah. Yeah, Yitri too.

ROVER

You can just do this.

ALYSSA

Ok.

RIK

Oh, ok.

ROVER

You can do whatever you want. I don't control you guys. Hey.

RIK

Alright.

ROVER

I control Elowin. Elowin's fucked. (Laughs)

[Zoe laughs]

RIK

Pierre catches up to, is what I should say.

ROVER

Mmhmm.

ALYSSA

Yeah, Yitri follows very closely behind and is like, kinda just... Do we hear the conversation that happened? Like, do we... do Pierre and I hear that Kol was like, "You don't know these people?"

RIK

How audible is it?

ROVER

Is this conversation being held…? Yeah, how audible is it? A stealthy way, or…?

MIKE

I mean, I think he was sort of like, because he's quite close to Aleks, he was sort of not whispering, but certainly saying in hushed tones, like, you know? Cause he isn't one of... we already caused quite a scene. I think he just wants to get out of this situation.

ALYSSA

Yeah.

ROVER

Then, because you guys were catching up, I will say this time you can't hear it without rolls.

ALYSSA

Fair enough.

ROVER

So, you guys wanna head to Manchester University?

ALYSSA

Yeah!

MIKE

Yeah, absolutely.

ALYSSA

Let's get scholarly and shit, I don't know.

ROVER

Get scholarly in the middle of the night. Alright! Cool.

RIK

Well, it's... it's closed, is it not?

ZOE

Like, what are we gonna do there?

RIK

Yeah, yeah. It's closed, is it not? Yeah.

ZOE

We can't even get in.

ROVER

It's quite closed. So… but, no, if you guys wanna head there, absolutely.

RIK

How close is it to our current location?

ROVER

I'll say about 15 minutes walking.

ZOE

But what are we gonna do there, then?

RIK

Maybe there's a security guard there that we can ask to open... (laughing) open the door for us. (Giggles)

MIKE

Actually... Actually, wait, wait wait. Sorry, this is a little bit of a personal question. How much does Aleks weigh?

ZOE

Uh, 72 kilograms.

MIKE

72 kilos. Ok, gimme one second. 72.

ZOE

I wrote it down today when I wrote the character sheet again, so. Randomly it was still in my mind.

MIKE

Hold on, I'm just doing some... I'm just doing some maths.

ALYSSA

I think I know where this is going.

ZOE

Oh no.

MIKE

Uhm. Wait, yeah, so that... that... Ok, oh, right, oh it's – oh, for fuck's sake. Right, ok, so, it's that... times that. Ok. Oh! Brilliant. Right, ok. Perfect!

ROVER

Mmhmm, perfect.

ALYSSA

Oh my god.

ZOE

Right, sure, yes.

MIKE

As we're walking up to Manchester University, Kol, Pierre and Yitri obviously have been in quite close proximity, I assume. We're all walking quite close together, aren't we?

ALYSSA

Yeah.

ROVER

Mmhmm.

MIKE

Kol knows that Aleks is a wanted person, and sees obviously that the doors are locked, most of the lights are off, I assume apart from a few lights that might still be on.

ROVER

Yeah, there are, uhm... what you can see when you get to the first building, if you look through the archway, you can see multiple buildings. In precise, there are six. And one of them has... like, looks like this dormitory and some of the lights are still on, yes.

MIKE

Ok. Kol is going to turn to Aleks and say,

MIKE [as KOL]

We need a vantage point. Hold on.

MIKE

And is gonna grab you under the arms and fly –

[Alyssa laughs]

– up to the top of the nearest building.

RIK

I – (chuckles)

ROVER

You're leaving the others behind.

[Zoe laughs]

MIKE

I checked the weight capacity on Kol and apparently with my Strength modifier times by 15 pounds, I can lift you easily.

ZOE

(Laughing) Ok.

RIK

Wait, do you do this as we arrive?

MIKE

Yep.

RIK

Just without any prompts.

MIKE

Yep.

RIK

Ok.

ROVER

I-I need... Ok so, I first wanna know, on any other building or on the University building?

MIKE

On the University building.

ROVER

On the University building, ok.

ZOE

Oh, oh gods.

ROVER

Pierre and Yitri...

ALYSSA

Hi.

ROVER

Kol just... Kol just kidnapped Aleks.

RIK

Wha–?

[Laugher]

RIK

What are you doing?

ROVER

Like, not actually kidnapped, but there goes Kol. And you can see that they land on the quite... like, to make this actually clear now, I keep meaning to say University of Manchester, however, Manchester University is just going to stay in there for now.

MIKE

It doesn’t matter. I think it’s okay.

ROVER

But I mean University of Manchester. So you guys get onto the roof. Are you going for the roof of the building, or on the roof of the multiple towers that are in that building?

MIKE

Just on the roof of the building for a vantage.

ROVER

Got it. On the roof of the building. So when you are on the roof of the building, you can see in the middle the small plaza that is in the center of it. And then around, you can see there is a huge building for a library, there's a huge building for the school of magic. The main building that you are on top of is for the most known studies. You're looking at things like archaeology. Kind of just stuff like that. There's a greenery, there is... I need to check my notes, because I probably forgot something. And there's the dormitory. And a big building for Bard college. That's the one I forgot.

MIKE

Ok. Kol and Aleks touch down on the roof and as soon as Aleks' feet hit the ground and we're down safely, Kol is gonna turn to Aleks and say,

MIKE [as KOL]

You've been quiet. Are you okay? That was a lot.

ZOE [as ALEKS]

Uuh, no, not really.

MIKE [as KOL]

Ok.

ZOE [as ALEKS]

I knew it would be... well, let's call it dangerous to go back here. But I... I didn't think something would happen so soon. Guess I was hoping... nothing at all would happen.

MIKE [as KOL]

Listen. For now you're safe on this roof, ok? What I need you to do is I need you to find an entrance. I'm going back for the others.

ZOE [as ALEKS]

I can do that.

MIKE [as KOL]

Ok.

MIKE

As he takes back off and goes back over to find the other two.

RIK

I like this caring side of Koltrast, holy shit. (Laughs)

ROVER

So, before Koltrast lands back down, Yitri and Pierre, do you guys say... do anything?

ALYSSA

I had a plan, but it kinda goes out the window.

RIK [as PIERRE]

He just flew off!

ALYSSA [as YITRI]

Ok, here's the deal. Ok.

RIK [as PIERRE]

Yeah?

ALYSSA [as YITRI]

So I can get you up there, kinda, if you want me to.

RIK [as PIERRE]

Argh... (Stammers) How?

ALYSSA [as YITRI]

Do you want... do you want to follow – hey, hey, hey! You wanna follow them to see if Kol is doing some shady shit?

RIK [as PIERRE]

I don't want him to hurt Aleks!

ALYSSA [as YITRI]

I-I don't either.

RIK [as PIERRE]

Yes! Get me up there!

ALYSSA

Ok, I'm gonna use Fey... Can I use Fey Step in this situation?

ROVER

Yeah, I'd say so.

ALYSSA

Is this building 30 feet away?

ROVER

I would... yeah, I would say so.

ALYSSA

She's gonna step forward, kind of dig her heel in the ground, put her hand on Pierre's shoulder and use Fey Step and he's going to plop right in front of the other two.

ROVER

So, Kol as you are saying "I'm gonna go back for the others", you just...

[Alyssa giggles]

How do you think... Does Fey Step for you have a look of things?

RIK

Ooh!

ALYSSA

Part of me wants to be, like, it'd be funny if he just popped in. Like, *pop*. But I think what would actually happen, since she is a Spring Eladrin, I think a gust of wind and some leaves would, kind of... You know when like... Ok, I don't know how to describe this without using my hands.

ROVER

Mmhmm.

ALYSSA

So you know when the leaves just kinda go like this sometimes? In like a little tornado

ROVER

Go like a twirl… a swirl. Yeah.

ALYSSA

Yes! It does that, and then Pierre kinda shows up. So it does like a little leaf tornado and then Pierre shows up.

RIK

Wait, wait, only I? Not you?

ALYSSA

Only Pierre, I can only teleport other people. I can't teleport myself.

RIK [as PIERRE]

Argh, I feel kinda nauseous of that. (Laughs)

ROVER

Ok. So Pierre... Pierre is now in front of you.

[Laughter]

Yeah, so, when Kol says "Oh, I'm going back for the others", Pierre's there.

[Laughter]

RIK [as PIERRE]

Argh, what did you do?

MIKE

Oh, yes, so Kol says, –

ROVER

Pierre's just there.

MIKE

–"I'm gonna go back for the others", and then this, yeah... this puff... is it like a puff or is it like a whirlwind? How does it work?

ALYSSA

A whirlwind, that's the word. A whirlwind of leaves.

MIKE

Ok, so a whirlwind of leaves appears next to him and he looks at these two and smiles and murmurs to himself,

MIKE [as KOL]

They had to be professionals.

[Alyssa laughs]

MIKE

And then carries on walking with Aleks towards the door that we’re looking for.

ROVER

You're leaving Yitri at the ground?

RIK

Yeah.

MIKE

Oh! Oh, I thought... Sorry, I thought you were together. Sorry, sorry.

ALYSSA

No, no, no, it's okay! No, no, no, I just want... Yeah. I mean, can I tel–, cause I think I wrote it down. Wait, let me just triple check.

ROVER

Can you read what it does, basically.

ALYSSA

Yes, let me just get that... I should've opened my Yitri masterdoc way before.

ROVER

It’s okay.

ALYSSA

Uhm...

ROVER

I just enjoy the fact that I had everything planned and I knew that I was like, "They're gonna break into the li– into the University. And my brain was just like, "Nooo."

[Mike laughs]

And I was like "I think they're gonna do it." "Noooo."

ALYSSA

So, you can magically teleport up to 30 feet to an unoccupied space you can see. Once you use this trait, you can not do it again unless you finish a long or short rest. When you reach 3rd level, your Fey Step gets an additional effect based on your season. If the effect requires a saving throw, DC equals 8 plus your proficiency bonus plus your Charisma modifier. So when you use it, you can touch a creature up to five feet of you, teleports them to... (stammers) teleports instead of you, appearing in an unoccupied space for your choice that you can see within 30 feet of you. So, basically I can just touch someone and they just are gone. So it's basically banishment, but, like, not.

ROVER

So, the roof would not be 30 feet up, however, because it's cool, I will allow you to do this for flavor.

ALYSSA

Yaaay! I love Rule of Cool!

[Mike chuckles]

It's 30 feet away, I think, but not 30 feet up.

ROVER

Yeah. Yeah, the building is 30 feet away, however, up is definitely more than 30 feet. Uhm...

MIKE

Oh, can I –

ROVER

But, yeah, I'll allow this. Yeah.

MIKE

Can I retcon something, then?

ROVER

Mmhmm.

MIKE

So, Pierre appears in a whirlwind of leaves. Kol walks past him, taps him on the shoulder and says,

MIKE [as KOL]

You're a hell of a negotiator.

MIKE

Turns backwards and just falls backwards off the building before spreading his wings and going down for Yitri.

ALYSSA

Oh my god, this character is so cool!

RIK

Pierre was looking down, kinda because he was feeling nauseous, and he just feels this tap on his shoulder and turns to look, sees a bird-man just fall down. (Laughs)

RIK [as PIERRE]

What is going on?!

[Laughter]

What is going on?!

[More laughter]

ROVER

Amazing.

RIK

And he... he kinda walks over towards Aleks.

ROVER

So Kol, do you also wanna pick up Yitri?

MIKE

Yes, please. I'm gonna pick up Yitri.

ROVER

Alright. You guys pick up Yitri, get back on the roof, alright. So, Aleks can you give me a... (Sighs) What do we wanna do? Uhm... Let's say Perception check with advantage. I'd say you know... you know the buildings well enough, because you've been here for multiple years. However, you have yourself never been on the roof. I will still give you advantage, though.

[Crickets continue to chirp in the background]

ZOE

Ok.

[Dice clacks]

Ok.

[More dice clacks]

Ok, that is a 22. (Chuckles)

MIKE

Dang!

ROVER

There are... on the roof there are classrooms that have those… There are these tilted windows that kinda go diagonal onto the roof –

MIKE

Skylights.

ROVER

Yeah, skylights. That you know that Mr Harrison, your Transmutation teacher, always has open to kind of let cool air in, because it's such a warm classroom in there. So he always leaves it open on, like, a little bit. So you think... you technically think that you could see if you could open it further and get you guys in there from the roof.

RIK

Pierre walks up to Aleks.

RIK [as PIERRE]

What are we doing here? We are here in business for the Crown. We don't need to... sneak in.

ZOE [as ALEKS]

Do you think I don't know that? I was suddenly on this roof! I was flying, Pierre! And I didn't even know why!

[Alyssa laughs]

RIK

And Pierre puts his hand on... reaches up and puts his hand on Aleks' shoulder. (Chuckles)

ROVER

I will say it will be the upper... the bicep.

[Laughter]

RIK

Oh, ok, ok. (Laughing) Puts a hand on your bicep.

RIK [as PIERRE]

Are you okay? Did he do anything to you?

ZOE [as ALEKS]

No. No, nothing.

RIK [as PIERRE]

Sorry, I was a bit... I was a bit worried of you. Uhm, sorry.

ZOE [as ALEKS]

No, it's alright.

RIK [as PIERRE]

What is going on with you? You were getting... you were getting arrested at the Palace and now you're... What's going on? Tell me, I'm here.

ZOE

And Aleks looks, like, very... very conflicted.

ZOE [as ALEKS]

I... Pierre, I'm sorry, I can't tell you.

RIK

Can I look... does Aleks have in their eye.

ROVER

His eyes.

RIK

Ok.

ROVER

He/him pronouns, by the way, Rik.

RIK

Ah.

ZOE

Yeah.

ZOE

Uh. I mean, still pretty scared, but also a mix of, like, kinda pleading for you to understand, but also being sorry that he can't tell you any more than that.

RIK

Pierre's abs– just out of character, Pierre's an absolute... He can't handle when someone, you know, looks either scared or pleadingly. He can't handle that.

MIKE

Pierre, the Emotional.

[Rover groans]

ALYSSA

(Laughing) He's perfect! I love you, Pierre.

RIK

Pierre lets out a deep sigh.

RIK [as PIERRE]

(Sighs deeply) Alright. I'll trust you on this. Please come back to me when you feel like talking, ok? I'm here for you.

ZOE [as ALEKS]

Thank you.

RIK

And then he turns to look out together with you.

ROVER

This is so sweet and then I remember they met 6 hours ago, and I love it.

RIK

Yeah, yeah.

ALYSSA

(Laughing) Six hours ago!

[Laughter]

ZOE

Yeah, yeah, that's why Aleks isn't saying anything.

MIKE

That's what makes it so sweet!

ROVER

It's so good, I love Pierre!

MIKE

That's what makes it so sweet.

ROVER

Oh my god.

MIKE

These are two people who don't know each other at all. Oh my god.

ZOE

Yeah.

ALYSSA

I love them so much! Argh!

MIKE

Aaaw.

ROVER

Stop the episode here, it's done!

[Laughter]

Emotions are done, now! (Laughs) Alright. So, yeah, you know a way in, Aleks.

ZOE

Yeah.

ROVER

And everyone's now currently also back on the roof.

MIKE

I was gonna say, as Yitri and I land next to you.

RIK

Are we just all looking out over the campus?

MIKE

We can be.

RIK

Just all standing in a line.

ROVER

You guys can all now see the campus.

ALYSSA

(Laughing) It's like the, (singing) "we built this city".

ROVER

And when you're not looking at the campus, you look back and you can see... uhm... hold up, hold up. I have an actual calendar for this campaign. So, I wanna know what day it is. It is a Tuesday. Love it.

ALYSSA

(Laughing) It's a fucking Tuesday.

ZOE

Love me some Tuesdays.

ROVER

So, you can see that there are still some people outside. And the lights for specific bars are still on, however you can see that as night is falling, the last bit of lights start slowly turning off as well. We are currently officially in midnight. I will say, just as a notice, if you guys do not rest in the next six hours, you guys are gonna have to make saves to make sure that you guys don't get exhausted.

MIKE

Exhaustion, yeah.

ROVER

Yeah.

ALYSSA

Ooh. We should definitely rest here.

ROVER

Yeah, what do you guys wanna do? You know the way in.

ALYSSA

Wait, was the trainride not a rest? We had, like, food and coffee.

ROVER

I will say, it can be a short rest. However, it's still not a long rest.

ALYSSA

We need a long one, yeah.

ROVER

Yeah.

ALYSSA

Yeah.

ROVER

Go for it, what do you guys wanna do?

ALYSSA [as YITRI]

Before we go in, should we maybe take a second and, like... breath? We've been kinda going back to back to back to back with a lot of stuff. Like, Aleks almost got taken. Uh, we just met Kol, like... And, you know, we've only been doing this job for, like, a day. I think we need a bit of a breather. I don't know about you guys. But, also, you wanna be teleported again, Pierre, I gotta rest a little bit before I can do that again.

RIK [as PIERRE]

Alright, well, uhm, (sighs) tell you what, how much time do we have? We can't be wasting too much time.

ALYSSA [as YITRI]

Yeah, of course.

RIK

And he's asking the group, how much time.

MIKE

Kol checks his pocket watch.

ROVER

Kol's checking a pocket watch. You have about... the most people start coming in to the University - Aleks also knows this - around 7. Like, 7 is officially when teachers start arriving and stuff like that.

MIKE

What time is it now?

ROVER

It is now 12AM.

MIKE

Midnight, ok.

RIK

Alright.

ROVER

It's now exactly midnight.

MIKE

So, Kol obviously says this.

RIK [as PIERRE]

Tell you what, we have two options. We either go in now, or we do this legitimately and come back tomorrow. You guys' choice. I trust you guys.

MIKE [as KOL]

What? We're on the roof, and you...

[Alyssa laughs]

RIK [as PIERRE]

We can always back out.

MIKE [as KOL]

Didn't you just teleport up here for this purpose?

ALYSSA [as YITRI]

Should we just keep going, then? I mean, like… I know…

MIKE [as KOL]

I think that's a good idea.

ALYSSA [as YITRI]

We could maybe take a –

ZOE

Aleks turns around to the skylights.

ZOE [a ALEKS]

Well... if nothing’s changed, they should be open right now.

MIKE

I'm assuming you go and try the skylight, or?

ZOE

I'm just pointing at them.

MIKE

Oh, well –

ZOE

I'm giving the option.

MIKE

– Kol walks over to the skylight.

ZOE

Like these should be open. Have fun.

MIKE

Yeah. Kol walks over to the skylight and tries to see if they'll lift. Gently, obviously.

ROVER

They'll lift. They are not locked.

MIKE

Perfect. Kol's like,

MIKE [as KOL]

Here. This is our ingress. Who's going first?

[Awkward silence]

Well, don't all jump at once.

ALYSSA [as YITRI]

I-I'll go first. I-I'll do it, I got it, I got it.

MIKE

Ok. How far is it down?

ALYSSA

Yeah.

ROVER

Not that far. I would say you can just kinda jump down without taking fall damage.

ALYSSA

Ok. She's just gonna take her axe off her back, she's like,

ALYSSA [as YITRI]

Hold Bonnie for a second.

ALYSSA

And then she jumps down.

ROVER

Can you roll me a Stealth check? To land stealthily.

ALYSSA

Yeah.

[Dice clack]

(Chuckles) Uh, stealthy, stealthy Stealth, Stealth, Stealth, Stealth, Stealth. What is Stealth? What is my Stealth? Uhm, I got a 10. (Laughs)

ROVER

You're fine.

[Laughter]

I have cursed dice.

ALYSSA

Yay!

[Zoe grunts]

ROVER

So yeah, you land well. Everyone else also wants to go in?

ZOE

Yeah, I'll follow.

MIKE

I was gonna say –

ROVER

Alright.

MIKE

Kol looks at Aleks –

[dice clacks]

– but this time seeing the fall that... (chuckles) seeing the fall that Yitri took, offers a hand out to sort of lift them down a little bit more gently.

ZOE

(Laughing) I got a 22.

ROVER

Oh.

[Laughter]

ZOE

(Laughing) I'm fine.

ALYSSA

(Laughing) Why is everyone... Everyone is sacrificing fucking Yitri.

ROVER

Aleks is fine. I think Pierre at this point might also be fine, if Kol is helping. Because you would roll with advantage and I feel... I don't know what you've already rolled. Pierre, on Stealth?

RIK

Pierre won't wait for Koltrast to go up.

ROVER

Ok.

RIK

But he will roll Stealth, yes.

ROVER

Mmhmm.

[Good dice rolls]

ZOE

Uh, wait, Ro, if we do with advantage, I got a nat 20.

ROVER

You have never seen a bard so elegant. Never seen a bard so elegant.

[Laughter]

And it is like, you... Actually, I can actually say this because you are a College of Dance. I used to.. I-I’m still a dancer. So you land in a perfect plié and it's just the most... it is the most beautiful way to enter your old school.

MIKE

Kol is completely aghast at seeing this happen. After everything else that's happened, he looks at this display of perfect Stealth –

[Rover laughs]

–with a flourish and is like,

MIKE [as KOL]

(Deadpan) Wow.

[Laughter]

ALYSSA

(Laughing) Just, the difference between your voice and his is really funny, still.

[Laughter]

ROVER

Uhm, because it's a nat 20; Congratulations, you now have proficiency in ballet things, Zoe.

[Mike gasps]

[Cheers from everyone]

If you see your ballet teacher at some point…

[Rik laughs]

You will... you guys will have a good bond. Uhm, so, I feel like even for Koltrast, it would be very easy to go in because you can fly. You can literally stop yourself from landing in any weird way, basically.

MIKE

Oh, yeah.

ROVER

Uhm, so you guys are in.

RIK

Oh, did you still need my roll?

ROVER

Yeah, I do need your roll, Pierre.

RIK

That's a 14.

ZOE

(Laughing) Pierre's still on the roof, is like, "I'm not going in".

[Laughter]

RIK

(Laughing) Pierre's just… “Guys!”

ROVER

You know, Pierre?

RIK

Yeah?

ROVER

It took you a moment, however, you get in a bit more gracefully. Then Yitri.

[Mike laughs]

ALYSSA

She probably tripped a little bit. (Laughs)

ROVER

Yeah, she tripped a little bit and you.. you just set your feet on the ground and, yeah, you are fine.

[Dice thumps]

Currently you guys are not noticed by anything.

MIKE

Amazing. Just to say it out loud, Kol is gonna start pulling down the skylight and then slip in underneath and land softly next to them.

[Cricket chirping ends]

ROVER

Ok. So you guys are looking at this, kind of like... this classroom that you can kind of imagine a Science classroom would be like. And on one –

MIKE

So we're in a classroom?

ROVER

You are now in the classroom.

MIKE

Ok.

ROVER

On one side there are different types of plants. And there seems to be a... a little cage with a... you can all kinda tell should be this small sleeping animal. And there is one glass, uhm... English words. (Going full Dutch) Vitrine, help Rik.

RIK

Vitrine? Jezus Christus. Uuhh. (Slightly panicking)

MIKE

Alembic?

RIK

Like one of those things you put like a reptile in.

ALYSSA

Oh, like a...

MIKE

Oh, an atrium. Is it an atrium? No, actually no, an atrium...

ALYSSA

Aquarium!

MIKE

No, terrarium!

[Crosstalk]

ROVER

Terrarium!

RIK

Terrarium, a-ha!

ALYSSA

Terrarium, that's the bitch! That's the bitch!

MIKE

Yeah, there we go.

[Crosstalk ends]

That's the one!

ROVER

With probably a reptile in it of some sort and then there's another terrarium where you can kinda see these very small gelatinous cubes just kind of hopping around. Hopping around in them.

MIKE

Oh, you didn't tell me we were in Minecraft.

[Laughter]

ROVER

Yeah, we're in Minecraft!

ALYSSA

(Singing) I am placing blocks and shit.

Yeah, that is currently what you see. There's a door closer to the desk that would lead out into the building.

MIKE [as KOL]

Alright. Does anyone know this building?

ZOE [as ALEKS]

Yes, and we... right now, we shouldn't touch anything.

[The sound of chirping and trilling of small animals begin quietly in the background]

ALYSSA [as YITRI]

Got it.

MIKE [as KOL]

Why not?

ZOE [as ALEKS]

Because this is a Transmutation classroom.

ALYSSA [as YITRI]

Oh…

ZOE [as ALEKS]

And I don't know what the last lecture was.

ALYSSA [as YITRI]

Oh…

RIK [as PIERRE]

Oh dear…

MIKE [as KOL]

Well, you're gonna have to lead the way.

MIKE

And he gestures forwards for you to go.

ZOE

I am currently thinking where...

MIKE

Ok.

ZOE

... we could go for the night.

MIKE

Ok.

ZOE

Cause, like, I feel this classroom is a bit too dangerous to just, like, up and sleep in.

RIK

Oh, we wanted to sleep in the fucking school? (Laughs)

MIKE

I was gonna say, Kol doesn't know that that's what you're thinking. He was like, "ok, we're gonna get in, get out and then we're gonna find a hotel."

ZOE

That makes more sense, actually.

RIK

Yeah, yeah!

[Zoe laughs]

MIKE

No, no, if you... go... go with you... go with your heart, you know?

ZOE

No, no, I know, I know, I know, I know.

MIKE

Go with the Gods, Zoe.

ZOE

Ok, Aleks looks around the room and then to the door and is like,

ZOE [as ALEKS]

Well, I wouldn't stop in here. It's probably not the best place to rest. But I could get the door open and we could look for somewhere else to go?

MIKE [as KOL]

We're still talking about resting? This is a job!

ZOE [as ALEKS]

Yes, and it is a job that includes communicating with people. The last time I checked, there's no one here.

ROVER

Just out of character, did you guys fill Kol in on who you guys need to find?

MIKE

Nope.

[Rover loses it]

RIK

No, we didn’t.

ZOE

I mean, not in Manchester, no!

ALYSSA

(Laughing) No, we did not. No, we didn't!

ZOE

We kinda got distracted.

MIKE

I'll be honest with you, Kol is trying to play an absolute blinder of a bluff game. (Laughs)

ROVER

I love Kol.

MIKE

But he has no idea what you're talking about or where to go, which is why he was like, "Right, who knows this building? You do? Right, you go!" (Laughs)

RIK

I was literally under the impression that we were gonna go into the persons' office, for some reason.

ZOE

Just wait till they arrive.

[Laughter]

ZOE

Just be like, "Hello! Morning, surprise!

RIK

Yeah, something like that. I don't know.

ALYSSA

Yitri's gonna first, be... cause I'm pretty sure she handed her axe to Kol, so she's just gonna first be like,

ALYSSA [as YITRI]

Hey, can I have that back?

MIKE

Oh, (Stammering) I-I... Ok, sure. Kol was absentmindedly holding your axe and just goes,

MIKE [as KOL]

Oh, uh, here.

ALYSSA [as YITRI]

Thank you. Ok, uhm, so... Here's the thing. I agree with you this is probably the worst room for us to be in right now. But, also, do you know if there's like, security guards walking up and down the halls making sure no one's broken into this school? Cause I feel like that's something we should probably consider, cause... Yeah, we're here on a job, but they don't know that. They’re just like, “oh, these people broke in.”

ZOE

Hey, Ro, do I know if there are security guards?

ROVER

Yes, you do.

ZOE

As in "I know there are some" or "I know the answer to the question"?

ROVER

There are at least four in every building.

ZOE

Ok. Ok, no, that's great.

ALYSSA

Oh dear lord.

ZOE [as ALEKS]

Well, there are like... if they didn't change the routines, around four security guards in every building.

MIKE [as KOL]

Ok.

ALYSSA [as YITRI]

Ok, so I don't think leaving is our best bet, cause we definitely look bad. We look like trespassers, cause we kind of are.

ZOE [as ALEKS]

We are.

ALYSSA [as YITRI]

Not kind of, we are. We broke into a building.

ZOE [as ALEKS]

Yeah.

RIK [as PIERRE]

We are.

MIKE [as KOL]

(Firm) Yitri, keep your voice down.

ALYSSA [as YITRI]

(Whispering) Got it, got it, sorry. We broke into a fucking building.

MIKE [as KOL]

(Whispering) Yes, we broke into a fucking building, because we're on a job.

ALYSSA [as YITRI]

Yeah, cause that's... ok, whatever. Uhm, so what now? I mean, we could break through the door, the security guard could be there. We're not gonna take out a security guard, cause that's not very "with the crown" of us. Do you know if, like –

MIKE [as KOL]

It's fine. Aleks over there said that they know this place and they know the security guards, so they have to know their routes and they have to know where they're gonna be patrolling. Aleks, it's all you.

ZOE [as ALEKS]

Sorry, do you think I'm a spy?

MIKE [as KOL]

What?

ZOE [as ALEKS]

The only reason I know of the security guards is because I was a student here.

MIKE [a KOL]

(Stammers) At this point, you're telling me that you don't know this?

[Alyssa giggles]

We are having a conversation later. First we gotta get through this. Now, come on. Where are we heading?

ROVER

(Laughing) I love that no one's telling Kol what to do.

ZOE

(Laughing) No, I-I was just thinking how to... Wait, ok, ok, let me...

ZOE [as ALEKS]

Kol, just... you know, to make sure we're all kinda on the same page. What is this job that you keep talking about that we need to do in this school?

MIKE [as KOL]

The same job that you're doing. Why are we having this conversation?

ZOE [as ALEKS]

Right, but do you know what that is?

MIKE [a KOL]

Yes, of course I do.

ZOE [as ALEKS]

So, you do know that we're here to talk with a teacher about information? With a teacher who's currently not here. That's why I suggested resting.

MIKE [as KOL]

Yes. Yes, I knew that and that's why I was suggesting that we... that we move so that we can find their office. And you seem to know where that is.

ZOE

I do know where the office is, right, Ro?

ROVER

You do know where the office is, absolutely. This was your teacher.

ZOE

Ok, perfect. Perfect. Yeah, perfect.

ZOE [as ALEKS]

Kol, I know how to get to the office. What do you want to do there?

MIKE [as KOL]

Wait for our contact, obviously.

ZOE [as ALEKS]

Right. So, you want to sit there for hours waiting for teacher who does not know that we're here or that we're coming –

MIKE [as KOL]

No.

ZOE [as ALEKS]

Or that we want to ask a question.

MIKE [as KOL]

I wanted to sit there having a fucking tea party.

ZOE [as ALEKS]

Well, that's great.

MIKE [as KOL]

Now, let's get a fucking move on.

[Laughter]

ROVER

Can I have a Perception check from everyone?

ALYSSA

(Nervously) Oh...

[Mike laughs]

[Dice clacks]

ALYSSA

Are you fucking kidding?

[Dice thumps]

My dice rolled over something and it was a nat 20 and then it turned into a fucking 2!

ROVER

Oh my god. Oooh...

MIKE

Ohh... (Laughs)

ZOE

That is... that is horrible.

ALYSSA

It was almost a nat 20 and now it's a fucking 2. Wait, what was the roll for? Perception?

RIK

I got a 6.

ZOE

Uh, 17.

ROVER

Yep.

ALYSSA

Alright, so I got a 3.

MIKE

No, wait. 22.

ROVER

22. Kol, from onto the roof that you guys just were, you can hear this *tap, tap, tap tap* –

[Tapping]

– of something actually, almost skittering along the roof. Give me a Nature check. Cause you're a Ranger. Give me it with advantage.

MIKE

(Gasps) Let's go! Oh, you revealed my deepest, darkest secret: my class!

ROVER

I've revealed the secret! Whoa!

ZOE

(Gasps) Oh no!

ALYSSA

Oh no!

[Dice rolls]

MIKE

With advantage, did you say?

ROVER

Mmhmm.

[Dice rolls]

MIKE

So that's a 14.

[Tapping continues]

ROVER

It sounds awfully familiar to... kind of like this skittering of a very large spider-like creature.

ALYSSA

Oh hell no. Oh hell no.

ROVER

And as you hear it, it comes to a stop. And then through the window, there is this...

[Ominous music starts playing]

Ok, I'm gonna have to explain this. Think of a spider leg. However, take everything off it away, keep just the bones. And there is this, kind of, very sharp bone going through the window –

[Sounds of bones cracking]

– and it pulls back with a kind of shadowy image before it's just gone.

[Ominous music and bone cracking instantly stop]

MIKE

Oh my god.

ROVER

And that is where we're gonna end the episode.

ALYSSA

What the fuck was that?!

MIKE

Oh my god! (Laughing) What was that?!

ALYSSA

What was that?!

RIK

What?!

ROVER

Well, what that is remains to be seen. Buh-bye, everyone!

ALYSSA

(Laughing) Fuck you, Ro! Fuck you!

MIKE

Bye!

RIK

Bye!

ZOE

Buh-bye!

ALYSSA

Bye!

[Show outro plays]

Remains To Be Seen is an original podcast created by Dyaflame Studios and licensed under the Creative Commons Attribution Non-Commercial Share-alike 4.0 International License.

Today’s episode was produced by Jo Mendacium and edited by Mees Verkade and Jo Mendacium. It starred:

Rik den Breejen as Pierre Ardoise

Mike LeBeau as Koltrast

Alyssa Roldan as Yitri Meadowtwirls

Zoe Emily as Aleksander Aintsworth

And Rover Elliott as the Dungeon Master

The intro and outro were composed by We Talk of Dreams, and the transcript was written by Kim van Teeffelen.

To get in touch with us and keep up to date with our antics, follow us on Instagram, BlueSky and TikTok @ DyaflameStudios or view our website at www.dyaflame.com

Check our show notes for additional credits, links and transcripts.